Let’s face it; success is hard – and uncertain. It might mean putting in long hours. It might mean learning new skills or doing things that scare you. It might mean some uncertainty and discomfort. Failure is much simpler. If you want to be a complete failure at everything you do, read on: I’m sharing the first 5 easy steps for you. And if you’re still set on being a big success, read on anyway, and call me.
1. Don’t Dream or Chase Other People’s Dreams
The best way to be a complete failure is to get your definition of success utterly wrong from the start. Base your dreams on those your parents have for you, or on your friends’ ambitions. Decide that you, too, should want a 6-figure salary (even if it means working 14-hour days). If you’re really lucky, you’ll meet your goal – and then you’ll realize that it means nothing to you. After years of hard work, you’ll still have failed. Clever you.
2. Start a Lot of Projects, Finish None
If you want to be a failure, get great at starting things. An idea hits (“I’ll start a blog about making money by flipping houses!”) You jump straight into it. Two days later, you’re bored. Another idea hits (“I’ll take up martial arts and become a black-belt!”) You get lessons. A week later, another idea hits (“I could play guitar in a rock band!”) You buy all the equipment. Are you seeing a pattern? One great way to fail to ever meet your goal is to keep starting on new ones.
3. Give Up When It Gets Tough
Most long-term goals have their tough patches. Sure, it’s easy going at first, when your motivation is running high. But pretty soon, you’ll get bored, or tired, or fed-up. If you want to be a complete failure, that first period of discomfort is the time to quit. Don’t ever try to see something through to the end. It’s just too much work.
4. Persist At All Costs
Of course, there’s a more spectacular way to fail than by flaking out early on. Once you’ve started something, don’t even consider giving up. Your business has been floundering for months? Borrow more money to keep it afloat. You’re writing a novel that bores you to tears? Don’t give up – see it through to the bitter end. You’re no quitter. (Though you’re well on the way to having a breakdown.)
5. Never Ask For Help
To be a failure, you have to insist on doing everything alone. Don’t ask for help. Struggle on with a far too heavy workload, because “if you want a job done right, you have to do it yourself.” You should never admit to anything that smacks of weakness. And, of course, you wouldn’t dream of asking for directions. Athletes practice every day under the guidance of a coach. Why wouldn’t you?